The great condom caper

I worked long days in a machine shop, so we didn’t see each other as often as we would have liked. Still, we managed, as young people do. When we had sex, we were shy and didn’t really see what the big deal was, but we loved being together. One summer, I was supposed to be sent to the countryside to work for a few weeks. My girlfriend came over the night before I had to leave, and we started making out and talking about the future. One thing led to another, and soon it was time to put on a condom. I really can’t stand those things, and I felt like I came while I was still struggling to put it on. We had a great time together, but when we were done, I realized the condom was nowhere to be found. It was still inside my girlfriend. Now we were really in trouble, and obviously, it was up to me to try to get it out. We didn’t dare poke anything else up there, so I crouched down between my lover’s legs with my hand inside her, feeling around for the condom. After a long search, I did manage to find it, but the damn thing was empty. I threw the condom in the trash, along with all my inhibitions.

          I drove my girlfriend home, and she said she felt waves of pleasure with every jolt of the car. That was in June. One month later, she told me she was pregnant. We got married in September, and she gave birth to a girl in February. After that, we were together for over 40 years and had six children in ten years. That’s just the way life goes sometimes.

-Father of six